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A Secret for a Great Life

A Secret for A Great Life

The other day I was on one of my long walks enjoying the lake area I am so blessed to live by and saw a father cutting grass on a riding lawn mower, which by itself may not be so note worthy, I admit.  However, helping him and maybe getting in his way a bit were two of his children; both kids where about 6 to 9 years old and each were also driving a small vehicle; one a small look-a-like riding lawnmower – kids version and the other a kids small ATV.  The dad riding his mower had just come to the end of his cut with both kids following close behind and as he turned around they emerged right in his path and there the three of them sat looking , laughing and enjoying an intimate family situation. 

I like seeing these types of things as they remind me of when my own son who used to walk next to me at about that age and push his own child version of a lawn mower as I walked and mowed our own lawn. Those types of intimate moments were great to share with someone special and great teaching moments although they never felt like I was a teacher.

At this age young people are so impressionable and they want to be and do things that their parents do.  It is important that parents set the right example, do the right things and that they explain how to do the right things to those young impressionable minds, even as those minds grow much older.  Understanding how things work in the world in which we live is important when building a life for oneself, wouldn’t you agree?  I believe we are always both the teacher and the student and should try to take advantage of any opportunity to learn from others as well as share with others something you may know.

As you read this article, I assume you are much older so I would like to ask you several questions.  Can you name three things that you want different in your own life right now…three things that you may want to change about how your life is going?  Maybe there are several skills or abilities you would like to learn or do better.  What about your physical condition, your health and diet or what about traveling to some of those exotic places you always wanted to visit?  Is your career where you want it to be; how are your finances; is retirement even an option?  Are you happy with your relationships; are you really in them?  How do you treat those people who really love you?  What about your spirituality, what do you really know about the Bible, God the Father, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit and life after death?  What about your generosity, your giving to others and simply helping others more; maybe educating and helping direct some young impressionable minds?  You know you may want many of these things in your life or want to simply make some changes to your life, so why haven’t you done it? Why are you where you are right now?

To make large changes in one’s life or to attain better than average results in the world you need to have some sort of a plan.  We have all heard things like, “you don’t build a house without first having  a blueprint” or “you don’t drive to a new destination without having a map on how to get there” so why would you want to live the only life you have without some kind of a plan to follow and guide you?

 Think for a second about a young person just starting out in the world, maybe it’s your daughter, son, niece or nephew or better still it’s you when you where much younger and that person comes to you for advice about how to live the best life story possible.  What do you tell them?  The advice you give them can literally change their future.  You wouldn’t say”just take things one day at a time and see how it plays out”, would you?  Remember, you love this person and they respect you enough to ask you for your life’s advice.   

Wouldn’t you sit them down, explain that life is filled with choices and that there will be decisions they will need to make everyday which can really affect their future, that it’s important to make good choices.  Wouldn’t you tell them that there will be many challenges to overcome and what works best is to be prepared for those challenges…to have their mind, body and soul in tip-top working order so they will be better prepared to make the best choices?  Wouldn’t you try to show them that to get to this state of life readiness, they really need to lay out a plan?  They need to have a sense of direction of what they want from their life and to have some level of self-awareness and that starting with a basic fundamental plan for their life is a good place to start. 

Wouldn’t you explain to them that it’s ok to make mistakes, that everyone makes them, and that we must learn from them and try not to make them again…that our mistakes are usually events that provide us with our best education in life and we should view them that way.  Wouldn’t you tell them how important it is to forgive others who made mistakes as well, remembering that none of us our perfect. 

Wouldn’t you point out to them that in life, discipline is very important…doing certain things correctly and over a long period of time can eventually provide a very positive return on that investment of their time, money or effort?  That saving and investing a portion of their income, eating healthy foods, exercising regularly and staying active and living a life true to their values, beliefs and having integrity is very important. To never give up on faith, hope and love that they all have their place and are needed.  

Wouldn’t you say to them that the world is moving very fast and as you get older you will realize how fast time truly moves by and you should not waste it but use it wisely.  Wouldn’t you tell them that learning new things, studying topics they are interested in and developing themselves throughout their life is very important in their future years and will constantly add to their lives in ways they may not understand right now. That it is never too late to learn or experience something new.  Wouldn’t you try to explain that as they got older, the knowledge and experiences they will absorb in the years to come will make their view on life different and they will be able to see so many opportunities around them they would never otherwise have seen. You might also try to explain to them that as they grow older they may also start to see and feel some regrets about not doing some of the things they should have done many years ago. 

You may also at this point try to convince them of the importance of writing things down and to draw up an actual plan of how they want their life to go; how they want their life story to unfold; what they may want from their life.  This plan for their life may help remind them and re-focus their attention to the things they may want to do now and later in life, they will really appreciate that they actually did the things that were on that plan. Also to communicate this plan to their spouse and ask them for their plans so you can both truly enjoy the lives you both want to live and merge both your plans into one.  As they grow older they will have that life plan to look back on and see where they were, what they did and didn’t do and how they got to where they are today.  They will see many of the challenges and options that were presented to them and what decisions they made and how things turned out and be able to learn from their pasts.

As you go over this with them would you not start to think and ponder to yourself why you are not doing this very thing as well right now?  You know it is never too late to start planning for tomorrow and beyond.  You know there are things in your life that you want to do, things you want to experience and there is still a person you are yet to become.  You know all this, so make your plans and live your own life story. Write down some new exiting chapters and then go live them. This is, I believe, a secret to a great life.  Always remember, it is never too late to make plans, accomplish goals and become a better you.

Make sure to leave comments about this article below.  You never know whom you might help when sharing your own life’s wisdom and by all means, have a talk with a young person and explain to them the importance of plans and executing on them. 

Here is a nice quote and wish to end with by Jonathan Swift, “May you live everyday of your life”.

 

Gary J. Kiecker

LifeLongU™

Where is Your Relationship At?

A Relationship Made in Heaven…

 

Where is your relationship at? Has it been blessed by “Heaven” or seemingly cursed by the “other” place? Life on earth can be difficult alone; being able share it with her/him can make some things better, but may also add more challenges.  Make sure you are ready to commit to solving those challenges together.

What do you do to make the most of the relationship you have with your special someone?  Do you do anything to make it better?  Is there enough communication with her/him?  Do you listen to your partner when they are communicating to you?  Do you like to keep things spontaneous? Do you show appreciation and respect for each other?  What attracted you to her/him in the first place?  Have you discussed each other’s needs?  Are your partner’s beliefs and values close to the same as your own?  Is there laughter or tension in your relationship?  How do you find a special someone in the first place?  Do you know what you really want from a relationship, wife or husband?  Do you know what you really need to give, in a relationship, or are you all about receiving?  What makes you happy; does your partner know this?

All good questions, I’m sure you would agree…so how did you answer those questions?

For me, I was married for over 20 years and thought I knew what a good relationship was.  I was a good hard working family man and thought I was even a better husband.  When it ended, I really asked myself, what did I do wrong?  What could I have done better?  I did assume part of the responsibility for it ending and in truth, did want to understand how to make it better, next time.

I do believe in marriage.  In two people becoming one person, sharing everything and having each other’s backs through thick and thin.  A relationship with another that works harmoniously together enjoying each other fully and is filled with love, honor and respect.  I see now what could have been done differently; what changes could have been made; and the importance of selecting the right partner in the first place.

How do you pick your relationship partner?

First, you have to meet the individual in person (not via text or email) …then physical attraction comes or mental attraction, maybe both; do you feel some chemistry or energy between you both?  Does your partner feel it?  Now, what?  You have the passion and heat that comes with a new beginning, the unknown, the unexplored and the many possibilities.  But that really is not a relationship yet, at least it does not have the ingredients for a long lasting relationship at this point.  You need to go deeper; more layers of the onion need to be peeled.  You need to explore each other’s belief and value system through many hours of communication; you need to discover each other’s character; do they say one thing and do something different.  You need to explore their future plans, what do they want their life to be in say 10, 20 or 40 years?  It all sounds fun doesn’t it? It can be, and it’s up to both of you to make it fun.  That is part of building a long lasting relationship.  You need to enter into each other’s lives; visit the family and get to know each other’s circle of influence.  If one of you does not like this, that is a sign…read it as such and know, that maybe, this relationship was not meant to be; end it and move along.  The only thing worse than settling for ½ a cup of loving relationship is entering into a long-term relationship when you already know you won’t be totally happy.

The Lord blesses relationships that follow his word.  That does not mean they are not challenged.  If you have chosen wisely in your relationship partner, chances are good, that you will move through your challenges and grow closer together.  A woman and a man each play different roles in a relationship blessed by Heaven.  They play different roles because each was created different and has different ingredients needed for a blessed long lasting relationship to succeed and be enjoyed by both.  All these ingredients are necessary.  If you want to taste something exceptional, something made in Heaven, add “all” your ingredients into your relationship and make sure your partner does as well.  Work together and make something special for both of you to enjoy.

I have tasted of this myself.  My “Special” someone and I have only known each other a short amount of time (as far as time goes), but feel we have known each other for many years.  We both have thrown in all our ingredients and are making something that I never would have thought possible.  I wish the same for each of you!  May God bless your relationship!

 

Gary J Kiecker

www.LifeLongU.com